Opening Doors.

“Learning to open again”
All of us at one time or another have become hurt and in our pain we become sad, lonely, angry, depressed and we withdraw from people and life. We learn how to close ourselves off from everything and everybody. Sometimes this is okay and necessary but it also prevents us from living our lives and in some extreme cases can ruin our lives and others. In my suffering, I built my own walls around myself, it was of my own making. I had to close myself off from anymore loss and hurt in my life, I guess I succeeded when I really ended up locked away from the world within prison walls. At that point I stopped caring. I lost trust in myself and in others, I stopped believing that I could ever be happy.  Back then, my life was just a real negative and bad place that took me away from my loved ones. My attitude was, I will never let anyone get close to me again. So, at the worst point in my life, I lost all hope and belief  and in so doing closed myself off from the world and everyone around me.
I changed the way I thought. What I have learned since then will last me lifetimes.
I learned to change the way I thought about myself and others, the world was no longer a bad place, it was a beautiful place. I learned to love myself and others, this is when I opened up again. I believe that everyone I know is special to me and precious. Everyone is my family and I love everyone dearly. I also for the first time seen in myself this compassionate, loving side that somehow I forgot, my inner child. We all have it, we should never forget it.
Life is too short to not love everyone and to most of all be forgiving of ourselves and others. Now, I felt this love opening that changed my whole life. I felt this love for the entire world that overtook me. I felt this universal love for all life and all people. I was called to be a Priest. My whole life changed after that. It was all due to opening up again and changing the way I think about things, life and people. Zen says to empty your cup of tea! Hehe. No joke! :P
Most of all I learned to stop judging others, as others judged me in the past. I care about everyone deeply. I finally learned to open up and fully love again it was the most beautiful thing in the world. To see so many people who like me, just wish to love and be happy and peaceful.
I also believe that others can heal from their pain and suffering in the past and present. Not only can being hurt close us off to receiving what it is that we most desire in life, Whatever it may be. But our hurt can also be our awakening.
Remaining open and loving while we have been hurt is actually a way to help us through the difficult situations we face daily in life. So that we are not closed off anymore, we are able to help ourselves and others. By opening up our hearts again we can begin to heal and that is when this universe will open up with endless possibilities. For we must know that we are only limited and closed in our minds. Truly our minds have no limits, or doors to shut and close on this world. We learn to overcome adversity, hopelessness, negativity, and more importantly just how to live in this world without going insane. To let go of our negative emotions so we are no longer controlled by them.
I know firsthand now what it means to open up to everything and everybody, and I also know what happens when you get past your hurt and pain. All the things in life that have prevented you from your hopes and dreams is now within reach. Buddhism teaches us that life is all a dream, well I have news too, this maybe a dream but one of our own making.
Now you can begin to heal and open up once again. To love fully again and live life for all that's it worth. It is quite a beautiful thing when you realize that through your pain and darkness that you have come to find the light of your inner being and all beings. That now you can create your own world, your own nirvana or paradise, In religions they all talk about a divine spirit and I believe as does the Buddha. That this spirit and light is nothing more then our openness and willingness to love all people and things. That is when we have learned to open up to what we truly are.  -sadmonk